In leadership and in life, connection is everything. But not just any connection…intentional connection. It’s the difference between checking a box and truly seeing the whole human behind the title.
Intentional connection begins with curiosity. Who is this person beyond their job? It’s easy to see coworkers only through the narrow lens of their roles. manager, recruiter, janitor, but each person carries a story, emotions, and passions that shape who they are. When leaders take time to discover those stories, communication becomes meaningful and trust deepens.
Rituals Over Checklists
Culture is shaped not just by values, but by the small, repeated actions that express them. Rituals, intentional habits that become part of a company’s DNA, have far more impact than forced checklists.
Think about the power of leaving a handwritten note, sharing a thoughtful gift card, or creating an annual tradition that celebrates the team. These small acts of appreciation don’t need to be elaborate; what matters is their consistency. Over time, rituals spread naturally as others adopt and adapt them, creating a ripple effect across the organization.
Systems that Spark Connection
Meaningful connection isn’t only about spontaneous gestures. It can also be encouraged through systems that make consistency easier. One example is using employee engagement platforms that prompt team members with reflection questions each week. A simple prompt like, “Who do you want to recognize this week?” can unleash waves of gratitude.
When responses feed directly into shared spaces like Slack, recognition becomes visible across the company. What starts as a nudge transforms into a cultural habit of acknowledgment.
Leading the Whole Human
True connection goes beyond tasks and performance metrics. People want to be seen for their full selves, interests, challenges, and lives outside of work. Small details matter: asking about a hobby, sharing recipes, or even creating Slack channels for pets, plants, or life hacks.
These spaces remind everyone that they belong to a community, not just a company. Over time, these connections form the glue that makes work more than a job.
Authentic Communication
Authenticity is critical when the news isn’t easy. Instead of hiding behind formality, strong leaders show vulnerability and acknowledge the weight of tough conversations. A practical tool for this is the FBI model of feedback: Feelings, Behavior, Impact.
For example: “I felt caught off guard when this happened, and it affected the outcome in this way.” This approach avoids blame, keeps the focus on shared understanding, and invites dialogue. Emotions can’t be denied, and when they’re communicated openly, feedback feels constructive rather than combative.
Culture Is Created by All of Us
Culture doesn’t just flow from leadership, but it’s co-created by everyone on the team. Appreciation and care can come from peers just as powerfully as from managers. A team that surprises a colleague on their work anniversary with balloons and coffee demonstrates that culture is alive in everyday actions.
Whether formalized through policies or lived out in small gestures, culture exists no matter what. The question is whether it will take shape by default or by design.
Listen to the Episode: Gut + Science 297: Intentional Connection with Charlie Saffro
Key Takeaways:
- See beyond the title. Understand the whole person, not just their role.
Prioritize rituals. Consistent, intentional habits of appreciation leave lasting impact.
Leverage systems. Use tools that prompt gratitude and fuel consistent conversation. - Lead the whole human. Recognize personal interests and life outside of work.
- Communicate authentically. Use models like FBI to share feedback with clarity and care.
- Remember culture is collective. Every individual action contributes to the bigger picture.
Things to listen for:
[00:02:00] Why it’s important to see people beyond their job title and understand the human behind the role.
[00:06:45] The power of small rituals, like handwritten notes and coffee gift cards, in shaping culture.
[00:09:30] How simple systems, such as weekly prompts in engagement tools, make recognition authentic and consistent.
[00:11:45] What it means to turn rituals into a foundation for culture rather than just “norms.”
[00:17:00] Why leading the whole human matters and how to create space for life beyond work in conversations.
[00:22:00] A practical feedback framework: FBI (Feelings, Behavior, Impact) for authentic and constructive communication.
[00:25:45] How culture is co-created by the entire team, not just leaders, through small, meaningful actions.
[00:31:45] The importance of soliciting employee feedback, even when it’s tough to hear, and taking visible action.